Chapter 6: Planning and Decision Making | Emotionally Healthy Discipleship

Tuesday July 16, 2019

Chapter 6: Planning and Decision Making

Making plans for God without listening to him has been standard practice for thousands of years. In this podcast, Pete talks about the 3 indispensable questions he asks to stay anchored in making plans and decisions that flow out of deep inner life with God – whether they be in personal leadership or with a team.

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2024 (8)

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Tuesday April 16, 2024

5 Relationships Every Leader Needs to Flourish

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The quality of the people who surround you will determine the success of your leadership. Because there is undeniable loneliness in leadership, it is ever more important that we evaluate our relationships on a regular basis.

Sadly, far too many pastors and leaders choose to go it alone, or surround themselves with foolish counsel (in the form of wrong relationships)

That's why in today's podcast, I explore the five types of relationships you need in your life in order to flourish as a leader or pastor.

Honestly, I wish I had this list 30 years ago. It would have saved me from confusion, foolish decision-making, and unnecessary isolation!

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Tuesday April 02, 2024

The Loneliness of Leadership

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In this episode, we explore a topic that's as old as leadership itself: the loneliness that often accompanies the role of leadership.

From the slowness of change to the weight of difficult decisions, from the sting of criticism to the ache of betrayal, leadership can often feel like a solitary journey. But we can take heart because all throughout the Scriptures leaders have grappled with this very same loneliness.

And yet, loneliness can become destructive when it turns into isolation.

In today's episode, I share 4 critical steps that leaders must take to navigate loneliness while remaining healthy and whole.

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Tuesday March 19, 2024

Staying Steadfast Through the Fires of Leadership

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Leadership is a crucible through which God is changing YOU into a new kind of person. Throughout your leadership journey you will be taken through a series of fires or tests from God that exists to purify you from the inside out.

In today's podcast, I share about the many tests you WILL encounter if you haven't already. If you are not prepared for these tests, you will stumble and drown in discouragement. If you are prepared for these tests, you will be transformed into the image of Christ.

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Tuesday March 05, 2024

The Secret Ingredient that Unlocks a Radical Church Community

A course won't change your church.
Neither will a book, a podcast, or a sermon series.

So the question is, how do people truly change?

This is a question every pastor and leader needs to answer. Over the years of my pastoral ministry, and even today, one thing I've noticed is how often we UNDERESTIMATE the personal time, presence, and intentionality it takes to disciple people into transformation in Jesus.

True change is slow because it is relational. Change does not happen on an assembly line.

Over the past several weeks on the podcast, I've shared with you the importance of reclaiming a spacious life - one that is not rushed, crammed, or overscheduled. Many leaders are coming to understand this as it relates to their PERSONAL life and walk with God.

But today I want to share with you about creating spaciousness for OTHERS. I believe it's the secret ingredient our churches need to experience deep communal fruitfulness.

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Tuesday February 20, 2024

Tune In and Let Go: Lessons from the Prayer Life of Jesus

As leaders, we know that PRAYER is the heartbeat of life in Christ. But often, our vision of prayer can become lop-sided, leading to a heavy weight on our shoulders.

For my first 17 years as a Christian, I had a one-dimensional view of prayer. I thought prayer was a tool I was supposed to use to make God's kingdom come. So I would devote 6-8 hours a week in prayer meetings, interceding for revival and believing that unless I prayed, God wouldn't come. I thought that was what Jesus called us to.

But over time I learned to see something different in the prayer life of Jesus. The gospel of Luke highlights a way of being with God that is less about striving and more about attunement. It is true that prayer DOES require perseverance and devotion, but for reasons different than we think.

In today's podcast we explore the prayer life of Jesus and what that means for us today.

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Tuesday February 06, 2024

Break Free from the Deadly Temptation of Self-Promotion

Leaders in a digital age face a unique pressure to always be in front.
Our social media platforms entice us to be seen, to be recognized, and to be liked.

Underneath this is a lie that to be hidden is to be forgotten, and to be unknown is to be unloved. This is why one of the greatest temptations leaders face is self-promotion.

Even Jesus faced this very temptation in the wilderness, yet rightly perceived it as a deadly trap from the evil one. Like Jesus, we must resist the many ways we are tempted to elevate our name and ministries into prominence.

Is all self-promotion really sinful?
Aren't we called to reach people?
How do we live and lead publicly without being robbed of joy and contentment?

I address these questions and more on today's podcast episode.

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Tuesday January 23, 2024

Put a STOP on Your Hurried, Rushed Life

In 2024, church leaders will be sifted left and right.

Mature from immature.
Wise from foolish.
Substantial from surface level.

This I know – the most effective leaders (and the ones worth following) will draw a line in the sand and put a full stop to accepting a rushed, cluttered, and constricted life.

They will reject speed, crowds, and noise in favor of a graceful, unrushed way of life. I call this lifestyle "spaciousness". It's one of the secret weapons of true spiritual mothers and fathers of the faith.

On today's podcast, I explore the theme of spaciousness, making applications for how leaders can resist the way of the world, and decisively shift into a new way of life with Jesus.

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Tuesday January 09, 2024

The Radical Decision Every Leader Must Make in 2024

Leaders in 2024 are facing pressures and challenges greater than any other in my lifetime.

Elections, wars, rumors of wars, economic pressure, global instability, scandals, artificial intelligence, etc.

This may seem overwhelming, but there is a unique opportunity before us. As leaders, this will require the decision to radically re-align ourselves to God's purposes and plans in the world today.

On today's podcast, I share some personal reflections on what I believe "radical realignment" looks like and then offer 3 specific invitations from God in this season.

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Tuesday December 26, 2023

The Kind of Fighting Every Church Needs

As we approach 2024, there couldn't be a better time to revisit your discipleship strategy. Here's why...

In North America, we are ramping up towards another election year. For most Americans, this has become a time of increased anxiety, stress, and relational volatility. As a culture, we lack the tools to have difficult conversations (especially political ones) without resorting to blaming, name-calling, avoiding, and "dirty fighting."

Sadly, we do this in the church as well.

For the first 17 years of my Christian walk, this was all I ever knew. I simply mirrored what I learned from my family of origin. My mother yelled and screamed. My father was an appeaser who later exploded in anger. I learned to become an appeaser, which cost me dearly in my marriage, leadership, and church.

For both Geri and I, we had to completely re-learn what it looks like to fight (and negotiate differences) in the new family of Jesus. We now call this skill "Clean Fighting Vs. Dirty Fighting".

I'm convinced every pastor, leader, and church needs this one skill to flourish in 2024.

In today's podcast episode, my wife Geri and I share more about the ins and outs of "Clean Fighting", the final and most important skill of Emotionally Healthy Relationships.

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Tuesday December 12, 2023

Staying Grounded When People Are Driving You Crazy

We're in the thick of the holiday season – a time full of joy, yet jam-packed with people, parties, and productions.

This season has a dizzying effect on everyone - but especially leaders. One temptation is to put a smile on our face while skimming over the frustrations, disappointments, and other inner workings of our souls.

We have people and situations that are bothering us at a core level, but rather than leaning into difficult and heartfelt conversations, we choose instead to avoid them. When we do this, we step out of integrity.

This was how I operated for years as a pastor. I had people that were getting under my skin, but no tools to communicate what I was feeling in a healthy way. I chose instead to pretend I was feeling one way when secretly I was angry.

Take a moment to reflect. Is there a situation that is bothering you?

A staff member is chronically late to team meetings
Your children are texting during a family meal
A volunteer is saying they are doing their role, but they clearly are not
A church elder or board member is living a non-exemplary life
Someone dropped the ball on getting out promotions for your Christmas Eve service.

Chances are, you have plenty of other examples.

To live and lead with integrity, we must be able to disentangle our emotions and values so we communicate them to others in a healthy way.

This is why my wife Geri and I developed a tool called the "Ladder of Integrity". It's a series of questions that we use to identify our emotions, values, and hopes. This allows us to communicate to others with clarity and kindness.

In today's podcast episode, my wife Geri and I share more about climbing the Ladder of Integrity, an essential skill of Emotionally Healthy Relationships.

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