I went to great lengths to prepare myself for leadership as best I could. I accumulated knowledge, skills, and experience from a vast array of Christian arenas. My hope was that no person, trial, difficulty, or circumstance would break me, regardless of the force of the hurricane. I sought to live in the reality that the same power that raised Jesus from the dead was now in me (Eph. 1:19–23). I reminded myself that greater is he who is in me than he who is in the world (1 John 4:4). I prayed like David, “With your help I can advance against a troop; with my God I can scale a wall” (2 Sam. 22:30).
I was determined to remain stable, firm, consistent, and faithful. I was going to be a warrior, a soldier, and a servant for God and his church.
My preparation, however, both formal and informal, left out one of the most important biblical pathways to grow in spiritual authority and leadership — brokenness and weakness. I didn’t understand that leadership in the name of Jesus is from the bottom up, not a grasping or controlling of circumstances and people. It is leading out of failure and pain, questions and struggles — a serving that lets go. It is a noticeably different way of life from what is commonly modeled in the world and, unfortunately, in many churches.
As a result, when the really big storms hit, I wasn’t ready.
Learn more in this podcast about God’s strange pathway of living and leading out of brokenness and vulnerability.
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