Many of us live inhuman lives because we believe inhuman rules like “don’t be sad”, “it’s bad to be angry”, or you’re weak if you’re afraid.” I will give myself license to feel all my feelings and not mark any of them as bad or weak. ALL my feelings are “guests” sent to teach me something. I won’t put them in the driver’s seat and let them control me or put them in the trunk and ignore them. I will pay attention to them all and then decide what to do with them.
1. Quit Being Afraid of What Others Think 2. Quit Lying 3. Quit Dying to the Wrong Things 4. Quit Denying Anger, Sadness, Fear 5. Quit Blaming 6. Quit Overfunctioning 7. Quit Faulty Thinking 8. Quit Living Someone Else’s Life 1. Quit Being Afraid of What Others Think • I will not say “yes” when I really want to say “no” because I’m afraid the other person will be angry, sad or disappointed. I will quit agreeing with people if I really don’t agree with them. • I don’t need your approval to feel good about myself. I already have intrinsic worth and value as a human being because of God’s love in creating me and dying for me – I have nothing left to prove!
The journey into a profound spirituality for me began when I said, “I quit.” Take the following assessment below and see if you need to quit: You need the approval of others to feel good about yourself. You are angry, sad, or disappointed and feel guilty about it – or don’t want to admit it. You believe you don’t have choices. You do for others what they can and should do for themselves. You are so focused on others that you rarely consider your own hopes and dreams. You say “yes” when you would rather say “no”. You have difficulty speaking up when you disagree or prefer something different. You’re becoming a less loving person instead of a more, loving person. You are resentful and tired because you regularly “try to do it all.” You are afraid to admit your weaknesses and flaws. If two or three apply to you, you may need to. Read more.
While speaking to pastors and leaders in Armenia, Colombia this week, I was introduced to two amazing women pastors whom you can meet in this photo below: Edelmira Sanchez, the woman on my left, a married mom with 6 children lives in a town near Cali, Colombia. She was a leader in their Christian and Missionary Alliance church in 2006 when a paramilitary group assassinated their senior pastor. (The church is located in an area with significant guerrilla activity). She became the senior pastor in his place. Then the same people that killed her pastor threatened her. She was afraid but remained. She told me the story of when they arrived in the church with their guns to reinforce their point. She refused to be intimidated. The church has grown to more than 600 people under her leadership and has built a foundation to serve over 350 orphans in their area. They have also. Read more.
Geri and I were asked a couple of months ago how do you know if it is time to quit and get serious about this journey we call emotionally healthy spirituality. This was recently published in Knowing When to Say “I Quit” – 10 Ways to Know It is Time to Quit- Beliefnet.com Take a few minutes to see how many of the following ten statements apply to you. It may be time for you to quit. 1. You need the approval of others to feel good about yourself. 2. You are angry, sad, or disappointed and feel guilty about it. 3. You believe you don’t have choices. 4. You do for others what they can and should do for themselves. 5. Your rarely consider your own hopes and dreams because of your focus on others. 6. You say “yes’ when you would rather say “no”. 7. You have difficulty speaking up when you disagree. Read more.