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Tag Archives: perfectionist

10 Ways You Know If It’s Your Shadow

Everyone has a shadow. Shadows are those untamed emotions and behaviors that lie, largely unconscious, beneath the surface of our lives that constitute the damaged versions of who we are.  They may be sinful; they may simply be weaknesses. Most importantly, they lie concealed just beneath the surface of our more proper selves. You know it’s your shadow when: You are defensive when someone corrects you or points out your flaws. You are triggered by a person, or circumstance, saying things you often later regret. You act out inappropriately when under pressure. You dismiss others when they bring up a difficult issue about you and your behavior. You keep doing the same thing over and over despite the negative consequences. You are angry, jealous, and envious – a lot. You do and say things out of fear of what other people think. You become busier when you are anxious rather than more reflective. You. Read more.

Toxic Success in the Church

Are you suffering from “success” that is making you spiritually sick? The toxic success for most of us pastors and leaders has more to do with numbers and growth than it does with money or “things.” Nonetheless, it remains a very real sickness in the church. Here is a survey I adapted from an inventory Paul Pearsall developed in his provocative book, Toxic Success. Would the people how know you best say that: 1. Your success is coming at the price of being insensitive, and even oblivious, to the needs around you?2. You vacillate from high energy to total crashing.3. You are grumpy and don’t laugh easily.4. People are afraid to bother you because you’re too busy.5. You’re almost always doing several things at once.6. People have trouble getting and keeping your attention.7.  You don’t touch or hug much.8. You are perfectionistic and controlling.9. You’re critical and intolerant of other people.10. You often feel annoyed. Read more.

Toxic Success in the Church

Are you suffering from “success” that is making you spiritually sick? The toxic success for most of us pastors and leaders has more to do with numbers and growth than it does with money or “things.” Nonetheless, it remains a very real sickness in the church. Here is a survey I adapted from an inventory Paul Pearsall developed in his provocative book, Toxic Success. Would the people how know you best say that: 1. Your success is coming at the price of being insensitive, and even oblivious, to the needs around you? 2. You vacillate from high energy to total crashing. 3. You are grumpy and don’t laugh easily. 4. People are afraid to bother you because you’re too busy. 5. You’re almost always doing several things at once. 6. People have trouble getting and keeping your attention. 7.  You don’t touch or hug much. 8. You are perfectionistic and controlling. 9. You’re critical. Read more.