
Overfunctioning

Posted February 2nd, 2009 by Pete Scazzero

Geri and I have been working on her book, “I Quit”, since last summer. One to our themes relates to overfunctioning. Most of us in leadership struggle with this, including myself. Like an archeological tell, the depth of the issue only becomes clearer with time.

Overfunctioning can be defined as: doing for others what they can and should do for themselves. One way to remind yourself to settle down and wait upon the Lord and His timing is to remember the following five principles:
1. Overfunctioning disguises itself as caring
Martha disguised her overfunctioning as caring for the needs of others. In trying to accomplish too much, she lost sight of herself and her guest – Christ Himself! She offered hospitality at the expense of herself. She confused caring about someone with having to take care of them.
2. Overfunctioning perpetuates immaturity
In Exodus 18, Moses mistakenly believed his self-sacrifice was serving the people. In actuality, he became the largest obstacle, the bottleneck to the people’s growth and maturity. In Numbers 11, the Israelites demanded a rescue from their pain. Moses accepted the role. In doing so, he ensured their continued immature behavior.
3. Overfunctioning prevents me from focusing on my own life direction.
Jesus, at the end of his life, said, “I have completed the work you have given me to do.” Unlike Jesus, we easily get sidetracked from our own life direction by over-focusing on others. Overfunctioning toward others often results in underfunctioning for oneself. When I am overly-focused on others, I lose sight of my own values, beliefs and goals.
4. Overfunctioning erodes my spiritual life.
One of the subtle yet most insidious effects of overfunctioning is how it separates us from God. When we cross the line into running God’s world for him, we enter into dangerous territory, into the very rebellion of our first parents. When I am overfunctioning, I don’t stop enough to allow God to be God. For this reason, contemplative practices, such as Sabbath-keeping, silence and Daily Offices, help me resist this temptation.
5. Overfunctioning destroys community
The examples of Moses and Martha give us a visual picture of the negative impact of overfunctioning on communities, whether that community is a church, a workplace, a school or a family.

What other destructive effects of overfunctioning might you add? What has been one or two ways you have kept your feet on the ground to prevent being swept away by other people’s needs and agendas?

Tags: destructive, healthy community, immaturity, overfunctioning, underfunctioning

8 Comments

Great topic Pete! I have been learning to develop a new way of relating to and caring for people who have difficulties. I am working on NOT taking on other people’s jobs which they could do themselves (this one is still difficult for me). I am learning to be less concerned about things others are responsible for that are not done “perfectly” or according to my standards (this does not mean that I don’t hold them accountable but it means that I allow them to use their God given SHAPE). I have also began to remove faulty expectations of myself. I know that I still have a LOT of growing left but I know that I have grown in this area over the last year and a half.

Posted by: Kevin M. // February 5th, 2009 at 11:53 pm

This strikes very deeply at the heart of who we are and why we do what we do as Pastors. I think it really even reaches to the depths of all of us as humans, and especially as the Church.

For Pastors, so many of us do what we do because we care so much (or at least we started that way!). But I feel it so deeply, the part about caring becoming overfunctioning.

I wrestle with this all the time, especially in regard to holding others accountable, as Kevin mentions in his comment.

Posted by: Paul Kuzma // February 6th, 2009 at 2:49 pm

Pastor Pete, I’m glad you posted about this. I think you know it’s one of my core issues. You ask for other destructive effects of overfunctioning? Here’s one I know well: it breeds resentment, in both the heart of the overfunctioner and the heart of the one being relieved of his/her own burden. Because of your #1 above, it can take a while to recognize that resentment, but I’ve found that it’s always there somewhere.

Sometimes, as I practice letting others go in a healthy way, it seems that the resentment about my NOT taking on my usual role outweighs any ongoing stewing resentment… but as I stay true, that always passes into a healthier place. For me anyway. Sometimes that means the relationship ends, but that is what it is.

How do I keep my feet on the ground and not get swept away by others’ needs and agendas? Well, I fall short and get swept away still. But I’ve learned a few things. I work with a number of women who are trying to get sober, and one thing that helps is to have a frank conversation upfront about expectations and what my role is (and isn’t). That one conversation is never enough tho. It has to be reinforced by actions; I have to point out when/where the agreed-upon boundaries are not being honored. That used to infuriate me — it’s hard enough to do the work to set the boundary! — but I’ve come to understand that it is a human thing to test boundaries, to push and confirm limits. It’s really hard sometimes to reinforce the boundaries I’ve set, and it’s often painful, and I don’t always do it as well as I’d like…, but it is always rewarding.

PAIRS is helping me grow so much in this area…

Posted by: Mindy M. // February 7th, 2009 at 9:26 am

Kevin. Geri and I have just spent a couple of weeks trying to get our learnings down on this topic for a chapter she is writing. We have been struck on how many areas remain in our own lives to work on regarding overfunctioning, especially with teens and pastoring!! It really is a lifelong journey! Jesus seemed do have an acute sense of separateness and yet healthy interdependence that did not cross the line into overfunctioning (e.g. leaving the 12 to the Holy Spirit.)
Blessings

Posted by: Pete Scazzero // February 10th, 2009 at 11:36 pm

This list had me cringing because it’s so true! I have been overfunctioning for a very long time. I didn’t even know!

Is my calendar being full for the next month a sure sign of self importance? It sure seems that way!

Thanks again for the reminder to slow down.

Posted by: Esther // February 19th, 2009 at 3:52 pm

Pete, thank you so much for writing about overfunctioning. I think you missed one of the most destructiv effects of overfunctioning. It seems to result in burning out automatically.
Greetings from Germany,

Tobi.
Tobias Friedel
Pastor of Seventh-Day-Adventist Church in
Osnabrück and Diepholz, Germany

Posted by: Tobi // February 24th, 2009 at 9:13 pm

Hi! I was surfing and found your blog post… nice! I love your blog. Cheers! Sandra. R.